Intuition vs Over-Protector
Have you ever had that feeling when you hear or read something that really lands for you, and you just KNOW that it’s truth?
Yes, that’s what I’m upset about!
Yes, that’s why I feel so weird in this relationship!
Yes, that’s the kind of career I want to have!
Some people describe that feeling as a fluttery sensation, or feeling grounded and strong.
It’s important to connect to how that sense of knowing feels for you, because you can give yourself other messages that may also seem true in a way, but are actually not.
These other messages can sound like:
I’m not good/smart/funny/pretty enough…
I’m too slow/boring/needy…
I’m going to fail, so I should play it safe…
These messages can feel true, even though they’re not. Each of us has a voice inside that gives us messages like these as a form of protection. It probably started when you were young as a form of self-defence during a difficult time.
And thank goodness it did! You needed protecting and your very wise self found a way to protect you!
The problem is, the very helpful way that you protected yourself when you were 5, or 11, or 16, is probably not serving you well any more as an adult.
I call this voice the Over Protector. It’s goal is to protect us. But the ironic thing is, if we let this voice make all our decisions, it actually causes more harm than good. Its main perspective is one of scarcity and not-enoughness.
You can get some insights from the messages of the Over Protector. But this voice should not be driving the bus.
How to tell the difference: “ease” vs “easy”
Your Intuition voice comes from the deepest, truest part of you. It’s the source of all your wisdom, compassion, courage, clarity, and certainty. It’s the voice inside you that counters not-enoughness and scarcity with agency and abundance.
Your OP may feel and sound true in your head, especially if you’ve been listening to it for a long time. But it’s not your real truth, and there are ways to tell the difference.
When you listen to your Intuition, you feel more ease. This doesn’t mean that things are easy, necessarily; there’s a difference between “ease” and “easy”. Ease feels like flow. It might still be hard, but you have energy and momentum to do it anyway.
When you listen to your OP, it may feel like you’ve chosen the “easier” path, but it likely also makes you feel stuck or heavy or like you’ve let yourself down. It feels like protecting yourself from scarcity instead of daring to believe in possibility.
If you look around at your life and it feels like you’ve sacrificed yourself to please other people or to avoid failing, then you’ve probably been letting your OP drive.
And you know what? That’s totally understandable! Of course you would listen to a voice that kept you safe during a hard time. You’ve been trying to do what’s best for yourself. But at this point in your life, you’re listening to the wrong advice.
And you know what else? It’s totally possible to choose a different way – if you want to.